Fortune Teller
by wise-imagination
Summary: Sasuke was forced to disguise for his S class mission and you get it right, a fortune teller. Wow, he never knew he was that good! SASUNARU LOVE LOVE!


Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I'm broke, so please don't sue me!

A/N: Please, please excuse me for my spelling and grammar errors! I beg you! (sobs)

WARNING: This is SHOUNEN AI/YAOI/MALE-MALE LOVE or in the other word SASUNARU story! If you somehow end up here, do not panic, I repeat, do not panic! Drag your mouse, fingers or anything and click at the suspiciously gleaming 'BACK' button. I assure you, you'll be safe. Fuh, that must be hard.

Un-beta'd.

-**Fortune Teller**-

The youngest Uchiha heir sighed for the eight times that day.

He was annoyed, bored to death and on top of all, he was mad. God, he wanted to kill somebody, mainly a certain teacher of his and the Fifth Hokage. Just the thought of the two of them died from a slow and painful death is enough to cheer up the miserable raven-haired Uchiha.

Here he is, locked up in a big spooky dark tent with mountains of weird herbs and bundles of fake spell books and did he say that he was forced to dress up in an oversize black fabric with hood at the back? Yeah, the one the old witch wore? That one. And it was so freaking hot in here!

What the hell they were thinking?!

He could have been screwing his little blond right now instead of wasting his precious time, sitting infront of a freaking crystal ball muttering nonsense with all the stupid smoke that came out from nowhere (he had no idea), telling good news and _mostly _bad news to his stupid fangirls. And to have them crying all over their stupid fate is totally another problem that he has to face with.

And…

S-class missions my ass! Did a fortune teller is considered as an S-class mission to him? He's an ANBU captain for heaven's sake! But nooo, that old hag said the suspect, classified as 'HOT, SEXY BABE!' by Jiraiya, is a very dangerous person in Konoha because he, unfortunately it's a he, has the power to turn on every woman and some man in this village into sex crazed beasts by just wiggling his cute butt. Yes, only wiggling his ass. But that doesn't explain why on earth he has to disguise as a fortune teller. I mean, it's easier by stalking him all day long.

Right?!

However, the suspect of his is really good in hiding his track and only will let his guard down when eating ramen and listening to some random fate chat. This is where, he, Uchiha Sasuke, came into picture since he cannot cook ramen as good as the Ichiraku owner.

Now, focus. Tan flawless skin, golden bright hair, sky blue eyes, and about 165 cm in height, are the basic description of his suspect when he received a short report about him. No other details or whatever. He frowned at this, it's awfully familiar.

Suddenly, his sweet kitsune's crimson face, panting heavily beneath him, popped out in his mind. Dear God, this is a horrible torture. He muttered a few curses under his breath before he sighs again.

* * *

Uzumaki Naruto believes in many things; though sometimes it doesn't making any sense, like…um…estimating one's future through palm reading, calculating birth date and…and…many more. So, he couldn't help himself but to feel excited when he heard a fortune teller is here, in Konoha! It's like, WOW!

At sharp 10 o'clock in the morning, after having his ramen breakfast, the energetic blond had run to the Uchiha mansion only to find that his rival had gone out a long time ago. A bit disappointed, he dragged his legs to Sakura's house and asked the pink-haired girl to join him walking around the town to search for the fortune teller's stall. Hastily, the pink-haired girl agreed and hurriedly changes her sleeping gown into proper attire in 10 seconds.

Nonetheless, when they had arrived at the fortune teller's stall, Naruto started to have a bad feeling about this whole plan. He saw, every girl that went inside the dark tent will eventually came out after 2 minutes (the longest) with wet red teary eyes. Is it that bad? Maybe the old witch scare them away with murderous glint in her eyes, just like what the old hag usually did to him. He was scared to his nerves alright but hell, he won't admit it! Never!

Sakura was hesitated to enter at first, seeing all the girls crying, but after Naruto gave her moral supports (something between the line, "If she scare you Sakura-chan, I'm not going inside to save you. Damn it, it is so dark inside there and if I go, you might punch the wrong person!), she felt better, after she gave a few punches at him of course.

It took longer for Sakura to come out, and it is already more than five minutes and Naruto was getting worried about his teammate's safety. Still glued to his words, he waited outside impatiently while keeping an ear for any punching or screaming sound. None. Well, that's weird.

At last, she came out with a horror and pale face. Something is wrong here.

"Sakura-chan?" he called his friend, waving a hand infront of her face.

"H-Hello, Sakura-cha-" he stopped when the girl grabbed his waving hand harshly. Naruto winced at this.

"Naruto, is my forehead that big?" now, that's a creepy question.

"Ano…I guess…so…?" someone, kill him already!

"Ha! It's true then! Naruto, you what he said to me?" Sakura stared straight into his eyes; tighten her grasp on his hand.

"No?"

"He said that people with big forehead will have difficulties in childbirth!" she screamed hysterically.

"It's just a stupid statement, Sakura-chan, nothing to be worry about" he comforted his friend, patting at her back gently.

"And…and…he warned me not to be near Sasuke-kun, a-at least 5 meters! Said Sasuke-kun gonna have a terrible headache and will eventually die! Wahhh!" she sobbed and tilting her head slightly as if she was remembering something.

"Oh, Naruto, it's your turn now. Go on" Sakura said, pushing him towards the entrance with a smile.

"Huh? I-I don't think so, Sakura-chan. After what happened to you, I t-think I…" he was cut off rudely by Sakura.

"Nonsense! You're the one who wanted to come here. At least give it a try" she pushed him harder this time.

"Gahhh!! Sakura-chan!" he whined and he stumbled infront, landed his butt at the entrance before pushing himself up and entered the eerie tent. This is worse than entering the ghost house during Halloween last year with Kiba. He prayed that at any rate, he will die peacefully and his soul is blessed by God before taking another step inside.

Ok…now what?

"Come closer, dobe" a voice whispered and Naruto shuddered slightly.

"Dobe?" he heard a few curses and a soft cough.

"I mean, child" Naruto was very sure he knew this voice somewhere. Hmm…

He took another two steps forward and finally he saw a man, not a woman that he had assumed, in a heavy black cloth with the hood covering his eyes, smirking faintly at him, while his long, thin finger playfully circling the outline of a small crystal clear ball. A faint nasty scent of herbs caught his nose and he grimaced. He wondered, how the man infront of him could can stand the smell of it. It makes him wanted to throw out.

"Take a sit, child" the man gestured a chair near him and Naruto politely obliged. He was getting excited. Ah, imagine his bright future as the Sixth Hokage and the villagers finally acknowledged him as a worthy leader like the past Hokages and he was snapped back to reality by a loud cough.

"Child, I need to know your birth date or we cannot predict your future smoothly" the man said softly before giving out another soft cough.

"Oh, okay!" he quickly told his birth date and missed a sly smirk upon the man's lips.

"Ah, I see. You have a really bright future my child. You are a warrior since birth and a savior to humankind. I am sure you can be a very good leader" he smirked again. Oh, this is so easy. The raven-haired let out a small chuckle when he heard Naruto gasped in awe.

"Hontou ni?! Ne, ne, how about my love life? Will I have a family?" the energetic blond was getting more excited with his future prediction.

"Of course you will have one, child" the fortune teller replied patiently.

"Ah, is it with Sakura-chan? Cause I love Sakura-chan since forever! Is it tru-"

"No!" the other screamed in anger and Naruto flinched at the tone. Quickly, Sasuke pulled himself together. _Relax_.

"I mean, Sakura is not the one, my child. Please forgive me for my sudden outburst" again, the man coughed. Being a kind person he is, Naruto began to pat the man's back gently and asked,

"Are you alright, sir? If you are unwell, you should have a rest today. I can come tomorrow"

"There is no need for that, my love, I am fine" he assured the blond.

"My love?" Sasuke froze at the word. Shit!

"Ahem, my child, I think you misheard since my voice a bit husky today" _and I'm getting hot and horny here…_he added the last part to himself.

"Oh" thank God that Naruto is a little bit dense.

"Where am I? Ah, your lifemate. You see, your lifemate is actually…none other than the great Uchiha Sasuke. I know you are in love with hi-"

"Nani!" the blue eyes teen screamed.

"What? Is it too hard to accept?" Sasuke said, a little bit hurt when his kitsune pushed him away that but he never let it show in his emotionless face expression. Afterall, Sasuke smirked, Naruto still gonna be his alone in the end.

"No, not that! How did you know that I'm in love with him? Actually, I lied to you about the Sakura earlier, I just wanna test you out whether you are a great fortune teller or not. But, I'm had failed. It is now proved that you are the greatest fortune teller ever!" the blond yelped and hugged the other.

Startled, Sasuke asked, "You…you love me, dobe?"

"Of course, silly! I-I…wait, who are you calling dobe? Who are you?!" the blond quickly loosened up his grasp but did not succeed, when a pair of hands embraced him tightly around his slender hips. He trembled when hot breaths fanned his fine hair neck and the oh-so-familiar voice whispered huskily in his ears,

"You love me, dobe?" again, the blond shuddered.

"T-Teme! What in heaven's name-"

"Answer me, dobe" the raven-haired pinched the other's butt lightly, earning a soft moan.

"Y-yes, t-teme!" he replied, panting heavily. It is getting hotter and hotter as time ticked by.

Satisfied with the answer, the Uchiha gently nipped his new found lover's neck, getting harder when the kitsune in his arms squirming loosely and moaned. Again and again.

"Naruto, I love you too. I do really mean it. Though I would love to hear you screaming my name here but can you be at least be quiet and please stand still until I finish molesting you,okay? You can save the screaming later tonight" he said softly, cupping and squeezing Naruto's bottom and apparently the blond was so busy moaning to even actually listen to the Uchiha.

"Good" and hands are everywhere.

(A/N: You can now use your perverted imaginations and create the smutty sweaty scene in your mind. I know I'm evil)

* * *

Sakura arched an eyebrow up when she saw Naruto, finally came out from the tent. However, it is not the same Naruto that had entered the tent earlier. No, it was different.

Earlier Naruto was dressed up in his normal oranger attire, neat and his shirt was nicely tucked in. His earlier messy golden blond hair can be considered tidy for he had combed for two hours in the morning. He had no bruises, his lips were completely fine and Sakura knew he had not a single large hickey at the neck.

And you guess what?

When he came out from the tent, his bright orange jacket was open and his shirt was torn into half. His tidy hair became messy, messier than usual, as if he had just woken up from sleep. Angry hands and fingers marks can be found everywhere on his tan skin, red bruises everywhere. His lips were swollen, leaving them plump and sexy. And lastly, even a blind man can see two very, very large red hickeys with a perfect teeth mark between the joint at his neck and shoulders, warning off any females and males alike. Oh, you can see the sign clearly through the hickeys.

'He's mine!'

"S-Sakura-chan, he hit the right spot" that is all she can hear from him before he passed out.

"Naruto, are you talking about the future prediction?"

She questioned herself.

* * *

"Hokage-sama, mission succeed"

"Good, you can go now Kakashi" the copy ninja bowed politely and disappeared, leaving the Fifth Hokage laughing hysterically as she sipped her beloved sake.

"Ah, horny Uchiha is a very difficult thing to deal with"

* * *

-The End-

Wise-imagination: Please review!

And thanks for all the reviews for Exception; I loved every single review you had written for me!

(gives extra large box full of cookies to everyone who reviewed)

(gives two cookies to everyone who dropped by and read this story)


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